View Full Version : How to Annoy a Photographer
crosbyharbison
08-17-2009, 05:52 PM
Here are a few; please add more (:
Change the viewfinder focus.
While the photographer is walking see if you can detach the lens from their body without them noticing. Run. Bonus if you can get their eye cup too.
When they put the camera up to their eye always put your hand in front of the lens, when they put the camera down remove your hand; rinse and repeat.
If their lens cap is on shout as loud as you can "YOUR LENS CAP IS ON!"
Rodger
08-17-2009, 06:12 PM
Hahaha if you're the subject,
"Do you want me to pose like this? Or this? Or maybe this? Or even this?"
Constantly ask, "What's that lens do? How far does it go? Why doesn't that one zoom? My point and shoot zooms farther!"
If their lens cap is on shout as loud as you can "YOUR LENS CAP IS ON!"
Adding "champ" to the end of that gives it a bit more of a punch haha.
Sean Setters
08-17-2009, 06:37 PM
Here's one that actually happened to me yesterday during a shoot with a3 year-old...
Reach up and touch the glass on the end of the lens while having your portrait taken (was using a wide-angle lens and I was really close to the subject).
EDIT: I thought I'd include an outtake of the uncooperative subject. ;-)
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hotsecretary
08-17-2009, 06:43 PM
"Is that a Sony Camera?" - Replace Sony with whatever brand you wish, that isn't clearly printed on the camera ;)
Sean Setters
08-17-2009, 06:51 PM
"Is that a Sony Camera?" - Replace Sony with whatever brand you wish, that isn't clearly printed on the camera ;)
Or say, "Wow, your pictures are turning out great--that must be a really nice camera!" while ignoring the fact that I have 3 flashes being fired simultaneously usinghigh-quality, reliablewireless triggers while delicately lighting the subject using all sorts of light modifiers. "Yeah, it's the camera. Now shut up and smile."
alexniedra
08-17-2009, 07:11 PM
"Nice lens you've got there. How many millimeters is it?"
crosbyharbison
08-17-2009, 07:20 PM
"Nice lens you've got there. How many millimeters is it?"
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An opportunity to brag doesn't come everyday :P
alexniedra
08-17-2009, 08:11 PM
That's true... [:D]
Sean Setters
08-17-2009, 08:18 PM
"Nice lens you've got there. How many millimeters is it?"
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You know, 200 millimeters = 7.87 inches....and I'm a little proud of it. ;-)
RadicalTenth
08-17-2009, 08:48 PM
When using film ask:
"How many megapixels?"
,or when done taking photo:
"Can I see it?"
Keith B
08-17-2009, 10:13 PM
Say something like, "should only take you 10-15 minutes to get in and out right."
ShutterbugJohan
08-17-2009, 10:24 PM
Put power poles all over the place. LOL! [I]
If their lens cap is on shout as loud as you can "YOUR LENS CAP IS ON!"
One time someone did that to me, so I reached inside my lenshood to take the cap off, and... it wasn't there! They all laughed at me. [:$][:@]
Rodger
08-18-2009, 12:40 AM
When using film ask:
"How many megapixels?"
,or when done taking photo:
"Can I see it?"
My friend did that to me the other day. I was taking some shots of him biking and my 20D is in the shop. Using my mom's old AV-1 I pretended to look at the back of the camera and gave him a thumbs up and sarcastically said, "Yeah man I did!"
Edit* Same friend then proceeded to ask me the megapixels question.
Colin
08-18-2009, 03:11 AM
I was at an aquarium taking pictures with my 85mm. A lady asked me what kind of lens it was. I told her it was an 85mm lens. She said that hers went from 50-300. I told her that mine only did 85.
I could tell by the way that she was looking at it she was confused. I didn't feel like getting into aperture, so I enjoyed the confusion [:)] and dropped it at that.
Daniel Browning
08-18-2009, 03:42 AM
She said that hers went from 50-300. I told her that mine only did 85.
What's really funny is when you have the 400mm f/2.8 and people are like "Wow! How much zoom does it have?" and you tell them 1X. Priceless. :)
crosbyharbison
08-18-2009, 03:45 AM
What's really funny is when you have the 400mm f/2.8
Ya I'll be laughing all the way tobankruptcy
Sinh Nhut Nguyen
08-18-2009, 04:13 PM
What's really funny is when you have the 400mm f/2.8 and people are like "Wow! How much zoom does it have?" and you tell them 1X. Priceless. :)
I'm with you on this one Daniel [:)].
Dallasphotog
08-18-2009, 06:03 PM
I totally understand the questions about the 400mm f/2.8. I used it this weekend at my duaghter's soccer tournament and it generates the strangest questions.
Bystander) How much does that thing cost?
Me) Around seven grand.
Bystander) Are you crazy? How many megapixels is it?
Me) The lens is 400mm and the camera is 22 megapixels.
Bystander) That's stupid. Do you take pictures up thier noses or something?
Me) It's the same equipment SI uses to capture action sports. It's great in low light and produces amazing images
Bystander) I have a camera in my phone...
hotsecretary
08-18-2009, 06:15 PM
^^ LOL Some people!
It's like the little P&S with more MP than my 40D.. thinking the higher the MP, better the picture :)
Jon Ruyle
08-18-2009, 07:03 PM
Bystander) I have a camera in my phone...
And it does a slightly better job taking pictures than the 400 f/2.8 does making a phone call.
Dallasphotog
08-20-2009, 12:19 AM
Bystander) I have a camera in my phone...
And it does a slightly better job taking pictures than the 400 f/2.8 does making a phone call.
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What kills me is the people jumping into the aisle in front of me at weddings to get a shot of the bride on their camera phone. Then they want to show it to me later like I might need it to complete my assignement.
It's true the 400 f/2.8 doesn't make good very clear phone calls, but it can be used to set ants on fire in a pinch.
Colin
08-20-2009, 02:39 AM
It's true the 400 f/2.8 doesn't make good very clear phone calls, but it can be used to set ants on fire in a pinch.
Damn. I think you just pushed a few posters into the decision to buy. Does Sports Illustrated quality action shots, AND satisfies the pyro we like to tell others we left behind in childhood.
Good thing for the insects around here that my buying spree has ceased for the foreseeable future... On lenses anyway. I've got to save up to replace the printer that my future ex-wife is going to extort in in the promise of minimizing my future legal fees. Pay the lawyer first... Sure costs a lot to argue about nothing.
Until that time, I can get by with a can of WD-40 and a lighter [:D]
piiooo
08-20-2009, 11:20 AM
A couple of years ago, while photographing my friends' 2 year old, a cute little girl, she spat into my camera with a mixture ofsaliva and yogurt (I think). Thank God for UV filters. I think they should be obligatory when photographing kids.
SMcLaren
09-01-2009, 02:59 AM
Let them buy a £2064 5D markii, then bring out a £1042 7D mark i !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !
crosbyharbison
09-01-2009, 03:05 AM
Let them buy a £2064 5D markii, then bring out a £1042 7D mark i !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !
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apples/oranges full frame/crop
And put weather sealing "equivalent to the legendary EOS–1N" in it!!!! [8o|]
I totally understand the questions about the 400mm f/2.8. I used it this weekend at my duaghter's soccer tournament and it generates the strangest questions.
Bystander) How much does that thing cost?
Me) Around seven grand.
Bystander) Are you crazy? How many megapixels is it?
Me) The lens is 400mm and the camera is 22 megapixels.
Bystander) That's stupid. Do you take pictures up thier noses or something?
Me) It's the same equipment SI uses to capture action sports. It's great in low light and produces amazing images
Bystander) I have a camera in my phone...
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Oh ,you just made me spill my drink I laughed so hard! That is so hilarious but so true. My husband is one of those who just uses iphone and is quite happy with it[:D]. (He is also not allowed to touch my equipment as he changes my settings and that annoys me). I on the other hand spent all day talking about the new lens that just came out, the new 100L. He must have felt like I do when he talks sports [:'(] I lost him at "Canon just came with..." I am happy I can "cheat" at this forum[:D]
Colin
09-02-2009, 04:05 PM
Oh ,you just made me spill my drink I laughed so hard! That is so hilarious but so true. My husband is one of those who just uses iphone and is quite happy with it/emoticons/emotion-2.gif. (He is also not allowed to touch my equipment as he changes my settings and that annoys me). I on the other hand spent all day talking about the new lens that just came out, the new 100L. He must have felt like I do when he talks sports [:'(] I lost him at "Canon just came with..." I am happy I can "cheat" at this forum/emoticons/emotion-2.gif
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If you don't already have a macro, you can tell him that, from an audiophile's perspective (mine), you really do need that lens. I'm starting to wonder if I might need that lens more than my 180mm macro....
I should sit on it for awhile.
mpphoto12
09-02-2009, 10:15 PM
One way is how ignorant people think its easy just to "point and click" with a good camera. This is what my family says,,, huh being the middle child is bad...
District_History_Fan
09-02-2009, 11:04 PM
How to annoy a photog?
wear plaid to a portrait shoot
Ask questions like, "hey bud, you sure you got that thing in auto mode?"
spill a beer on his new 7Dto see if its really "sealed like the legendary 1N"
before he shoots the first frame of your portrait session, loudly state that you "are going to whiz" and trip over his lightstands on your hurried way out
ask the guy at the sidelines with the 1D3 and 400 2.8 if this is the first game he has ever shot
Keith B
09-03-2009, 12:28 AM
Raise the price of lenses on a weekly basis so that every time he puts off a purchase, it cost him a couple extra hundred dollars.
$2000 for the 70-200 2.8 IS! I paid $1499 in May or June.
Rodger
11-14-2009, 11:44 PM
Thought I'd bring this thread back to the top of the list haha.
I've picked up a few more since I got hired at a local portrait studio.
Don't mention any special requests, then complain: that the subject is not looking at the camera, that you wanted all portrait oriented shots, etc.
Buy only the $7.99 package after 20 minutes of shooting your impossible to work with children.
Come for a family portrait in kahki pants, and dark brown sweaters with small neon green stripes.
These all may or may not be things I've experienced.. hahaha
photosurfer
11-15-2009, 12:00 AM
What kills me is the people jumping into the aisle in front of me at weddings to get a shot of the bride on their camera phone. Then they want to show it to me later like I might need it to complete my assignement.
Ughhhh agreed. . . I was shooting backup on a wedding and the main photog's WIFE of all people was in just about every one of his important shots! What really annoyed me though was she was in a few of MY shots :-p Clone Stamp and backup to the rescue ;-)