If I understand what you are saying, I would say you are mistaken. I have Kirk "L" bracket on my camera, Wimberley plate on a lens foot, and some other off brand on another lens foot. All work fine with my Arca-Swiss ball head.
As for my tripod... I debated over light vs. stiffness. I also wanted the hieght without jacking up the column. The big and heavy tripod solved more problems for me. I do not mind carrying the weight. The camera and lens are usually on the tripod when I hike. It is extended and I throw it over my shoulder. Or I can fold it and strap it over my shoulder or back pack. I can tear it down and pack it in a suitcase, or I ship it to my destination. I would like a light one as a backup some day... but there are other things before that.